Wednesday, June 25, 2014

Remember when...

Remember when you had a laundry DAY?  When you took one evening during the week to get all the laundry done, and then you were good for another week.

Now you have to do two LARGE loads a day just to keep your head above water, and heaven forbid that anybody gets sick on the bedding when its not bedding wash day.  That's right, it gets its own day, and if you become lazy even once it starts looking like this almost immediately.

Remember when you and your honey decided to take an impromptu trip somewhere?  Remember how you were able to fit all you both needed for the weekend into a duffel bag?  Then you were ready for whatever adventure lay ahead.

Now you are lucky if you can squeeze all you need into TWO large suitcases, and that's only if you will have access to laundry facilities.  Then you will also have to bring along extra diapers and wet wipes because if its one thing you don't want to be caught being short on, its diapers.  If your little darling suddenly gets a serious case of the diarrhea (which on a road trip is completely awful) you DO NOT want to be caught lacking the supplies necessary to contain the me on this one.

Remember when you could cruise in a small compact car that used almost no gas?

Now the only vehicle that can transport your super sized family, and all of the accompanying equipment is a suburban that you are lucky if it gets 17 miles per gallon in gas.

Remember when all of your groceries fit very comfortably in the bottom of the shopping cart?

Now every shopping trip looks like you are hoarding food for the zombie apocalypse because you have not one over flowing cart, but two.

Remember when you and your darling could eat out for less than $25 at a fairly nice restaurant?

Now you can't get away with spending less than $30 at the cheapest fast food joint around.

Remember when you had a personal clothing budget so that you always looked like a snappy dresser in public?

Now you are a pro at finding awesome deals at garage sales, clearance racks, and know exactly which thrift store has the best gently used clothes and lowest prices.

Remember when you got to eat food off your own plate?  Without sharing unless you were feeling charitable.

Now the food you prepared for dinner isn't eatable from anywhere but off of your plate.

Remember when you cheered because your child learned to open doors, and you were so proud because it was further evidence that they were progressing in their development?

Now you want to cry in a fetal position because your youngest has mastered the fine art of door opening, when her older sister hasn't beat the compulsion to get into and destroy everything she encounters.  Now they are two against one.  Those aren't odds you are happy about.

Remember when you needed a specific recipe if wanted to cook anything other than spaghetti, oatmeal or scrambled eggs?

Now you have gotten so inventive in your meal making that you have made crazy yummy tacos,  sloppy joes, and spaghetti with meat sauce...all from left over meatloaf.  Just so you don't waste food when there are starving children in the world. (My kids still don't know.   So don't rat me out.)

Speaking of leftovers...remember when you had some?  Remember when you struggled to eat them all before they evolved to the point that they sprouted eyes and walked out of the refrigerator on their own?

Now you are lucky if there ARE any leftovers.

Remember when you got your child fully dressed daily with their hair completely fixed.

Now pants on the younger children is completely optional, and hair doesn't get fixed unless you leave the house.

Remember when you went to the bathroom by yourself...IN your own home...IN your own bathroom?

Now you are lucky to sneak off for a quick pee without World War III breaking out in the hallway as all of your children vie for your complete (and captive) attention.

Remember when you got tired, and went to bed for your requisite 8 hours?

Now you are lucky to rack up 6 hours of uninterrupted sleep, but more often than not its really more like 4 hours.

Remember when you only needed to run the dishwasher a few times a week because thats how long it took you to fill it up.

Now you run it a few times a day, and still wash some dishes by hand.

Now life IS more complicated, but it is also infinitely more rewarding.  I'm ok with not getting as much sleep, getting to eat off my own plate, go to the bathroom in peace (by myself), or getting to travel with a manageable amount of luggage if it means that I get to be mother to the best bunch of ladies ever.

DISCLAIMER:  I will say that my family of seven, parents included, barely quantifies "super" sized. Having five children hardly makes a blip on the super sized family spectrum.  Also, the views and experiences expressed in this post may or may not have happened or are currently happening at our house.  I'll let you be the judge.  

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