I will not beat my child...

I will not beat my child...when she gets out of bed for the 1000th time claiming that she's about to pee her pants.

I will not beat my child...when she doesn't actually go potty when she's gotten out bed for the 1000th time.

I will not beat my child...when she pours acrylic paint into my carpet (wet wipes will get this out if its still wet, just FYI)

I will not beat my child...when she pours half a gallon of syrup in the office (wet wipes aren't enough to save the carpet from needing a steam clean, just FYI)

I will not beat my child...when she randomly turns up with no clothes on when you know she was dressed five minutes before

I will not beat my child...when she refuses to wear any of her own panties, and will only wear her sister's treasured Rapunzel panties

I will not beat my child...when she is found in the front yard in her birthday suit, and rubber boots

I will not beat my child...when she announces to the entire congregation at church that she needs to go pee

I will not beat my child...when she starts pew hopping at church

I will not beat my child...when she goes ice fishing in my water cup after I just got after her for picking her nose

I will not beat my child...when she uses my shirt as her own personal snot rag

I will not beat my child...when she pours out my brand new bottle of crystal fabric softener

I will not beat my child...when she tries to brush her hair less than 5 minutes after I have fixed it, thus necessitating a redo

I will not beat my child...when she eats three bags of marshmallows on the sly (I'm pretty sure she had help will this one, but she was the sisters' collective scapegoat)

I will love my child...

because she's beautiful fourth daughter who's at that age where pretty much everything she wants to do is going to drive me crazy, and her desire to remain in the nude is frustrating.

I will love my child...when she can't wait to give me hugs and cuddles first thing in the morning.  Only after yelling 'GOOD MORNING' at the top of her lungs roughly 3 inches from my face.

I will love my child...when she amazes me with how much she has learned of her letters and the corresponding ASL sign

I will love my child...when she wants to help me cook dinner

I will love my child...when she wants to put away all the silverware in the dishwasher

I will love my child...when she squeals with excitement when her sisters are playing with her

I will love my child...when she gets super excited about My Little Ponies and can and will tell you all about it

I will love my child...because she's beautiful and she's wonderful and she's mine.